"Life Happened"

We go through life expecting. Expecting great things to happen, expecting to succeed at everything, expecting to have a perfect relationship and a perfect job, and expecting a perfect life. A life that we planned, at least. Now, when we meet Jesus and invite Him to be our lives, our plans are thrown out the window. See, when we ask Jesus to come into our hearts and be everything we need, our hearts align with His heart and our plans, whether we like it or not, don't really matter. We leave everything behind to be with Him and to follow Him. So after a couple of months of seeking His heart and wanting to know more, we have the tendency of drifting away. We no longer have time to spend with Him because we're too busy with... what? Facebook? Tv? Now we're years down the road. You still go to church every week, you go to bible study, but you know you're missing it. You're missing Him. So what happened? How did you get here? Life. Life happened. We got too busy forgetting about God and so now we're left in a confused state where God so desperately wants to have our hearts but we let the devil and our own selfishness control it. Everyone does this because we all sin and have fallen short of the glory of God. I sometimes feel like it should say "all have sinned and fall a hugely unimaginable distance apart from God's glory." Because that's true. Each time we sin and don't turn to God for forgiveness, we allow the gap that separates us from the Lord to grow farther and farther apart. However, the truly glorious thing about the Lord is that He sent His son to earth to die for us. So now, instead of that gap growing larger and larger, it's just a feeling. In reality, God is right there waiting for your cry out to Him so that He can come and rescue you from the life you choose to drown yourself in.

Struggle.

The thoughts that run through our heads, where do they go? Who do they pertain to? Why do we even think them? We know we have a God in Heaven who is greater than all the trials of the earth combined. Sometimes knowledge just isn’t enough. Just knowing isn’t enough. I need faith that God is alive and moving. I want this stone cold heart to break and burst into fire for the living God that was and is and is to come. I want so badly for Him to take my heart and rearrange things. I want to hear His voice as though it is my own, I want to speak only His words, I want to do only things He has planned for me to do. I want to know that I am His and He is mine and that nothing ever can separate us. I want to know that even though I am broken and needy and helpless, that is exactly where He uses His strength. I am nothing without Him. I have nothing if I do not have Him. Everything means nothing if it is not of Him. He is everything, beginning and end. I want my life to be a reflection of His and I won’t let Satan tell me I am failing when I know I’m not. I am a woman of God. He does love me. He makes me righteous and worthy and without Him I am absolutely nothing. He finds my flaws and makes them beautiful. He heals my heart when it’s beaten and broken. He is all of my strength. He is everything I’ll ever need. Because of Him I know that I am His and He is mine and nothing can ever separate us. Because of Him I know that even though I am broken and needy and helpless, that is exactly where He uses His strength. He is Healer, Provider, Savior, Alpha, Omega, beginning and end, Protector, Father, Lover, Fighter for man.